Have you ever found yourself checking your phone at an inappropriate moment? Or looking up from a casual game and wondering where the time went? If so, you’re not alone, as people report widespread feelings of dissatisfaction with the way they engage with technology and a lack of control over their own behaviors. "User engagement" is a fundamental design goal for many consumer-facing products, and the resulting technologies are often irresistibly engaging. Though modern technology offers enormous value and convenience, many people report struggling to disengage and an inability to change their habits. In this talk, I will describe a series of studies to understand people’s feelings about their engagement patterns and implement new systems and tools to support intentional engagement for both children and adults. Based on findings from this work, I will discuss what individuals, developers and policymakers can do to tackle this problem and improve our collective self-efficacy.